Destination: A better life.
This post is a story time post! It contains the top 3 goals I’ve achieved through the reflection discussed in the last post. Throughout my journey, the most helpful articles and pieces of advice always came with actual examples of where it worked. Therefore, I’ve included the below as inspiration. These are some of the things I’ve achieved which vary in size and tangibility. Alas, they have been achieved! The examples I’ve chosen to expand upon are less tangible but much more important. Some may say they are soul-level goals.
If you haven’t watched the movie “Happy”, I highly recommend it. It reviews what happiness means around the world. In most cases, happiness stems from either a connection/relationship or the state of flow through creation.
For me, being happier is something I have to work at. A big part of this stemmed from my hyper critical nature and never believing what I was doing was ‘enough’. Over time I set the goal to be happier and improve in little areas. At first I would track, morning, noon and night my happy meter. Slowly, I actively would shift my mood when I found myself with a sad face too many times in a row. This also came with cultivating gratitude, as well as being more vulnerable with friends. Lastly, over time as I came to know myself better, I was sure to engage in activities that I wanted to do and enjoyed. If you need help in this area, my post on being unapologetically yourself might help!
being more friendly
In a previous post, which I’ll find and link here, I talked about the ‘Im not angry, I’m from Philly’ shirt. Unfortunately, where I grew up wasn’t known for its friendliness. Often a fairly violent place, close by to both Camden and Philadelphia most people had a stoic way about them. Keeping a guard up at all times, and being suspicious to boot. When moving to the south, the culture difference was palpable. People waved when walking past, most people smiled and at the very least folks would make eye contact. Over time, I took note and started to enjoy making connections with people in my community. In addition, I’ve learned how much better life is by being friendly! It also helps to be happier when the on-goings of the day are pleasant and laughter is common.
This goal seemed far-fetched to me when I set it. At the time, I was traveling 100% for work, didn’t have a dedicated desk in the office I reported to and couldn’t seem to find any comforts day in and day out. (I briefly discuss this experience in a previous post.) Being apart from your world isn’t easy. The moment I knew I needed to make a change happened on the phone with my Aunt. Her youngest was in her teens and not only did I want to set a better example, but I also came to a ‘what is the point of all this’ moment. If wasn’t able to enjoy most days, and at least enjoy something everyday; what would be the point of chugging along in life?!
After I made this goal, I realized I was truly challenging myself. Huge changes were needed to get back on track. First, I wrote down the things I did enjoy about my current life (and some of them included my co-worker at the time and the snow where I was). Secondly, I wrote down all the things I knew I loved but couldn’t enjoy because of my schedule. Third, I wrote down all the things I was looking forward to enjoying in the future but hadn’t experienced yet.
After, I shifted my priority and focus to accommodate what I actually wanted in life. After I reorganized my life and made some huge changed, I started a list of things I wanted to do everyday. This list included the things that would ensure enjoyment everyday. Things to look forward to and simple cozy things too.
Improving and revisiting
While I have achieved these things over the years, it isn’t to say I haven’t had to continue working toward improvements. We will talk about continuous improvement in future posts, along with revisiting old skills. As time marches on it is always important to go back and refresh once in awhile.
For example, one of my most proud accomplishments was the training of my puppies, Zoe and Bianca. Bianca is now 12 years old, her training took place over a decade ago. At the time, my dogs were so well behaved, listened to commands and knew sign language. They were so in touch with my every movement, they could almost predict what was going to happen next. This took time and dedication on my part; throughout our years together it came naturally. However, the passing of her sister was a rough event for both of us. I had to brush up on my training skills and get back into a consistent pattern of working with Bianca everyday.
I would love to hear some of your big goals and destinations! And also any success you’ve seen or big changes you’ve initiated for yourself that could inspire others to start their own personal journey’s!
While I was originally starting off the journey to become happier, more friendly and enjoy everyday. A family friend introduced me to an amazing book (pictured here): The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz
The four agreements are:
1. Don’t take anything personally
2. Don’t make assumptions
3. Be impeccable with your word
4. Always do your best
This book can be life changing!